OK, so I've been completely annoyed with work the last few weeks. it's been even worse this week. And what sucks is that me moving to a new place, while a blessing, is also making me feel like I have to stay at my job....you know, the whole paying rent thing. So, I'm in my new place but I don't even feel like I can enjoy it because it makes me feel trapped since my job sucks so much. Didja follow that? So, I was depressed last night (which is unusual for me...I hardly ever get depressed) and I was still depressed this morning, even after my morning run (which is even more unusual). I just can't force myself to stay here just for the money and benefits. Is it practical to stay here? Yes, but how smart is it to force yourself to do something when it has such a negative effect on my emotional, mental, and physical well-being?? In other words, why force myself to be miserable just for money? I was brought up with values that did not hold money and materialistic things in high regard. Therefore, why the hell am I staying for money?

So, I'm trying to devise a plan to make much needed change in my life. I think I'm going to quit this Spring semester, take classes part-time, work a part-time job and get student loans. Student loans tend to scare me a bit, but how many people out there have two degrees and no student loans? Not too many....I've been really lucky up to this point, and perhaps it's finally time for me to join the masses and acquire some student loans.

But yeah, it's not the most straigh-forward plan, but maybe my life needs a bit of messing up in order to make some real damn change. I can't keep focusing my energy on something that doesn't "do it" for me. I need to start focusing on positive things.